Photo by Shanna Hullender Photography

"Adopting one child won't change the world; but for that child, the world will change."

Thursday, August 26, 2010

The GoOd, the BaD and the UgLy!

I've got a couple of posts that are weighing heavy on my heart. I have yet to share them at this point. They are raw and of course there is no holding back. Adoption is often painted all pretty and rosy but in reality there is so much about it that really SUCKS! <-----Yeah, I hate that word but it really sums up adoption - ugly and offensive. Don't be fooled into thinking that adoption is a win/win situation for those involved. Someone in the equation is always going to lose. Period. Isn't it amazing how something that has brought me so much joy has also brought me so much pain? I am apprehensive about my forthcoming entries because I know they will sting a few people. But then again, it is my blog which happens to serve basically as a journal for me. My intentions when I started this blog was to provide an account of our foster care adoption experiences. I simply can't state the good without stating the bad too. I read all the books and all the experts said it would be like this. So I guess it is what it is: Ugly.

1 comment:

  1. I agree that it would be wrong and misguided to look at adoption as a win-win situation. In a world that was as God intended, there would be no set of circumstances that would force or induce a mother to give up her child. (But a good many things wouldn't happen if the world were as God intended.:)
    I think that each adoption is different and that they can't all be judged by the same standards. In some cases, women are forced or pressured to relinquish for numerous reasons and in others, they perhaps look at their lives, social environments and cultures as they are and choose what they believe is, for their child, a life of different opportunity than they would have otherwise had. Please understand I'm not trying to say here isn't grief and the greatest loss imaginable involved. I don't think it's always pretty and rosy but I also think that on occasion it can offer hope to a biological mother who has to make the best of a bad situation.
    But you're right, someone will always lose. There is always a great uprooting of a soul and if it were a perfect world, such a thing wouldn't happen.
    I'm looking forward to reading your next entries. Take care.